Woody Allen... Always the Entertainer

“A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.”

“I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.”

“Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.”

“Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.”

“I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.”

“Some guy hit my fender and I said "be fruitful and multiply" but not in those words.”

“When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.”

"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No.'"

“I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.”

Someday...

Someday, I will live in a place like this. I will stay in that little house in the center with the teal blue awnings, preferably renting from a little nonna who bakes bread on Sunday mornings and tries to set me up with every eligible Italian bachelor in town under the age of thirty.

The house itself will be full of character, with creaking stairs and a brass crucifix hanging over the well-worn dining room table. Space will be limited, with just enough room for me and my perpetual stream of visitors (the guest bedroom will never be empty). Of course, the best part of the house (aside from the small deck that overlooks the Mediterranean) will be my study, a small library with a comfy patterned armchair, old scroll desk, and shelves of books that cover all four walls, floor to ceiling.

I will, of course, be fluent in Italian by then, and I will saunter forth every day to the piazza to buy my groceries for the day and chat with all my new friends. My favorite is Marco, the local baker who often slips in an extra roll and who loves to shout "Buon giorno, bella!" at me from across the piazza as soon as I arrive. And after an eventful morning in town, getting all the latest gossip, I will return home to my little paradise, spending the rest of the day writing and sipping caffè while looking out over the sea.

Whoops!

I was so exuberant about the birth of my niece that I completely forgot to go to class this afternoon. Just totally forgot that I had Marketing at 4:30 pm.

Instead, I casually left the office where I work at 4:40 pm and sauntered home with a huge grin and occasional giggle. Not until I was halfway home, when I was contemplating what I was going to do with my largely free afternoon, that I started to wonder why my afternoon schedule was in fact so empty. And thats when I remembered I was supposed to be in class. Whoops!

Oh well. It's not every day that you can excuse skipping class because of something as awesome and monumental as a new baby.

I'M AN AUNT!!!

Name: Isabella Maria Petroni

Born: February 25th at 1:00 pm (Pacific Time)

Size: 7 lbs; 18.5 inches long

Status: Healthy, beautiful and sleeping with her mama. Pictures to come!

Today! It's Today!

My sister's water broke today at noon, and I am so ansy today that I almost can't sit still. I am having a terrible time concentrating in my classes and at work.

I mean, it is impossible to concentrate on anything when I know Evangelina and John are about to meet Isabella. I can't believe that so so soon, we will have a tiny new member of our family. How wonderful! I've been saving up all my tears for the last week (I even refrained from frustrated tears while studying Tuesday night) so that I can have buckets of happy tears to shed when I see pictures of her.

And I do expect pictures of her. Pronto. ASAP. I'll be sure to post them when I get them.

I cannot wait for her to join the world, and in a few months, I can't wait to meet her and hold her and play with her itty-bitty baby fingers and toes.

Good luck Evangelina! I'll be thinking of you (and Isabella)!

. . .

“After my screen test, the director clapped his hands gleefully and yelled: "She can't talk! She can't act! She's sensational!""

- Ava Gardner (American actress in 1940s and 50s who, despite her renowned beauty and sensuality, successfully resisted being typecast as a sex symbol)

Go Get It

"You got a dream, you got to protect it. People can't do something themselves, they want to tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period."

- Will Smith, as Chris Gardner in The Pursuit of Happyness.

Missing the Olympics

I think this might be the first winter Olympics in memory that I haven't watched a single event on my own time. The only events I've been able to catch have been reruns that are playing on the televisions at work when I arrive in the evenings.

And the winter games are by far my favorite, because they have fun things like half-pipe snowboarding and figure-skating (the best event ever). Although on a side note, what is curling and why does everyone seem to be obsessed with it this year?

It's sad that I seem to be missing the entirety of this most auspicious and entertaining events... The closing ceremonies are only four days away!

On a totally unrelated note: The website for the 2010 Winter Olympics, vancouver2010.com, looks really cool... I like the icy blue-green theme.

Update on Frustrated State

Things are looking up. I've made a break-through, and things are magically starting to make a little more sense (little = key word here).

If I could paint for you a mental picture of the anguish and pain my poor brain has undergone in the last four or five hours, it would look like me hitting my head against a wall (of debits and credits) again and again and again... and I finally just broke through (probably by the sheer force of my frustration-- I think God felt sorry for me).

Accounting = Bane of My (Spring '10) Existence

I have never been more frustrated in my life. I have a Financial Accounting midterm tomorrow, and I want to cry. Why does none of this make sense to me? I've done the reading (for the most part) and I go to every class (though I'll admit to zoning out rather frequently).

It's just so goddamn boooooring. So boring, in fact, that I have a really difficult time forcing myself to focus... and I'd like to think I have a pretty good amount of self-control and drive when it comes to studying and things like that. I mean, I usually take my grades far too seriously. I guess this time around, not so much.

I just hate the fact that I literally started studying for this test last week, and it makes just as much sense to me now as it did then. I feel like I have made zero improvement in my comprehension of any of it.

And the best part is, how do I expect to make any progress in studying if every time I get frustrated, I just turn to someone (like you, my reader) to complain? This is getting pathetic.