College Graduation is Like a Breakup

You know those people who, when you ask them "How are you?!", they respond with a morose "Oohhhhh, you knoooowww...," instantly pulling down your happy vibes and going against social norms with a depressing answer instead of the peppy "Great. You?"

I'm becoming one of those people.

I majorly dislike those kinds of people.

Blah.

But seriously. People ask me how I'm doing and if I'm excited about having graduated. And all I can say (on a good day) is that I have mixed feelings.

Because to me, graduation from college is a lot like a breakup. Of the most monumental kind.

This occurred to me the other day, and with the help of my (former... *sniff) roommate Val, we flushed this analogy out via text.

Check it.

Me: I found the perfect analogy for graduating. Graduation is like a breakup. There is a lost of nostalgia for what is gone. We can never go back to that. Not really. And while we will get over it eventually and thoughts of a better future will get us there, it sucks right now and nothing people say about it being better this way will make me happy.

Val: Yes, because it wasn't my choice to break up. And right now, I refuse to believe or think about what good the future might bring. I'm in my mourning phase. It's an essential part of a break up and there's no getting around it here either.

Me: Haha exactly! But no one gets that. In fact, they all expect me to be excited. And I definitely don't want to hear that I am better off now.

Val: Ugh  I hate that! Why would I be excited? It's almost insulting, but I don't know why. Like didn't you know I was having the time of my life these four years?

Me: Right? Why on earth would I be happy?

Val: I have no idea. Instead of "congratulations" I half expect people to say "I'm so sorry for your loss."

Post-Graduate Adventures

If I've graduated from college, can I call the rest of my life post-graduate? Or does that term only apply to people getting their masters degrees or something?

Anyway, I've begun the rest of my life. Kinda. 

Not really.

Graduation weekend was full of family, graduation parties, and moving the massive amount of things out of my house (Four years ago, I started with five suitcases. Now my things barely cram into a Chevy Trailblazer).

It was a super busy, pretty fun weekend overall.

I carried the banner for my department, leading my teeny tiny graduating class of thirteen.

I got my diploma. In the picture below, I'm about to hug my favorite professor, Dr. Boyd (there's a bit of a shrug/"I made it!" going on there).

We also took SO many family pictures. So so many.

And I had a couple graduation parties, including a really nice big one with all my relatives in Tulsa. Check out the coolest cake I've possibly ever gotten.

But really, to give you the most accurate image of what my weekend looked like, it would be this...

... a lot of parties and group gatherings, everyone looking nice for special occasions, a whole bunch of family picture taking, and an adorable baby running around distracting everyone with her cuteness.

That was my weekend in a nutshell. My graduation sometimes felt like almost an afterthought in all the commotion. Which was fine with me. Left me to mourn its passing in peace.

And now I'm in Arizona for a couple weeks. The plan is to sleep for as much of the break as possible, to make up for the recent sleep deprivation of graduation week and get ready for the upcoming summer of teacher training with Teach For America.

Love in Having a Degree,
Moi

Graduation Time!

With the roommates, waiting to go into the stadium for Commencement.

President David Boren with our keynote speaker, Secretary of Defense Robert Gates.

The stage at Commencement

Evangelina, Isabella, me and Stan after Commencement

Making Picture Frames

My art teacher is awesome. Bomb dot com.

About a month ago, when we started the printmaking "unit" in my art class, I made this really cool print series as a birthday gift for my dad. But the problem was that the gift is made up of a bunch of small pieces, and I didn't want my dad to have to hang them all individually -- and risk him either not wanting to put them up because it was too much trouble or having super slanty pictures on his wall (I can just hear my dad saying "Oh yea of little faith" as I type this).

The solution? Make a picture frame structure to hold it all together. Daddy-proof! But also totally outside my area of expertise.

Art teacher to the rescue!

Over the course of two days (and a gazillion hours and counting), my teacher and I sawed, glued, air-gunned, and glued some more. And filled in all the holes with grainy "imitation wood" stuff.

Learning how to make picture frames from scrap wood = SO MUCH FUN!!!

I enjoyed wielding me some power tools. A refreshing change from my pretty subdued life.

Clamps held each side of the frame together, allowing me to align the edges perfectly
and then glue and nail gun them together.

Now the only things left for me to do are to spray paint all the frames black and make little wooden pegs to fit between the frames so they go together like puzzle pieces.

I can't wait to see the finished product. I've never made anything so substantial before, and now I really wish that I'd taken an art class before this semester. I'm addicted to the wood shop, and I'd be making all my frames for the rest of my life if I could.

Oh, that's me using a whatchoom'callit. To prove that I can actually be a handy person.

Also, please admire the snazzy new eyewear. All the cool kids have them.

The One in Which I Prepare to Leave College

I was flipping through a travel magazine yesterday morning while on the elliptical, and I saw this quote:

The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough.  ~Rabindranath Tagore

I almost cried.

I also was listening to Garth Brooks at the time, and the song "Unanswered Prayers" came on. And I almost cried.

A prompt song change followed.

Besides not being able to breathe (cuz I'm rather out of shape), the only reason I didn't cry in both instances was because I was in public. And once I start crying, I turn into an all-out heaving, sobbing snot-fest. I decided to save the other poor patrons of the treadmill from my blubbering. Besides, snot doesn't mix well with sweat.

So I saved it until I got home.

Then I replayed "Unanswered Prayers" and had a good long cry.

My third in two days.

I'm going crazy.

Or rather, I'm getting ready to graduate. And I'm trying to process that fact. Because it is a fact now. A looming, impending doom fact that will soon take me away from all I have loved so dearly in the last four years.

Oh, I know I'll be able to rebuild a home and community again. I will meet good people again. I'll grow to love them. And contrary to how it may seem lately, I am still very excited about moving to Alabama and teaching and working to change things.

And yet... there will never be anything like this experience again. No one will ever be able to replace the amazing women I have gotten to know here. I love them all, and it will hurt so much to leave them.

While talking on the phone with my mom the other day, she said that at least it actually does hurt to leave. That means you are leaving behind something good.

And it's true. I have decided that the amount of pain I am experiencing right now is directly proportional to how amazing my time in college has been. I guess I can be happy I hurt this much, because it means that I squeezed every ounce of fun, growth, and challenge out of these four years.

So I think of that butterfly quote above, and my interpretation of it (Live life to the fullest? Suck every ounce of awesomeness out of any experience you ever have?), and I am sorta heartened. Kinda.

Because while it didn't last long enough, it was perfect in every way. I can definitely say that I lived it up.

Taking Production Stills for Fellow Filmmakers

A couple filmmaker friends of mine were working on a major short film project for one of their classes a few weeks ago, and they asked me to take production stills of one of their shoots.

Per usual, I jumped at the opportunity to take pictures of something other than flowers and random objects around my house. I wanted to practice in different lighting conditions, and it was also a good chance to practice takings pictures in an environment that was out of my control.

As one of the many "deliverables" they are required to turn in for the class project, they need to turn in 300 pictures. I think, due to my overzealous picture taking, they got about 100 from this shoot alone.

I guess you can say I went a little crazy.

But I had so much fun in the process.

One challenge was that I couldn't take any pictures during the filming itself, because the sound of my camera's shutter was too loud. That's because the audio for this shoot was legit (see picture of professional sound guy with professional sound equipment above).

So most of my pictures were of the before and after prep of the film shoot. Good shots of the actors acting were hard to come by.

Overall, it was a blast. And a great learning experience.

Every time I take out my camera and mess around with the aperture and the ISO (and all those other little things to pay attention to when shooting), I learn something new. Usually learning comes from missed opportunities and blurry pictures.

Which makes sense. You learn from your mistakes, yada yada, etc. etc.

Hope someone asks me to do something like this again!

Senior Portraits

My roommate Tess asked me to take her senior portrait so she can include a photo in her graduation announcements. Always ready for an opportunity to use my camera for something cooler than snapping random pics for my blog, I was excited to help out.

It turned out to be an absolute blast. We headed over to the rose garden on campus, which is a great place to take pictures. The roses are all gorgeous and in bloom. You can kinda sorta see 'em behind Tess's beautiful face.

After having so much fun with this photo op, I'm trying to convince the rest of my roommates to let me take their senior portraits for them. Just for kicks, even though I don't think they think they need them. But they do. I have beautiful friends, and beautiful friends need to be photographed. It's like the law of nature and stuff.

Maybe if I can't find something to do with my life after this teaching thing ends in a couple years, I'll just become a professional photographer and take pictures of married couples and babies.

Love it.

Bam.

That's the plan.

Eleusinian and Being a Sorority Girl

Last Thursday afternoon, my sorority, Chi Omega, held a banquet (called Eleusinian) at the Stadium Club (this swanky place in the football stadium normally reserved for high rollers donors). The banquet, a soon-to-be-annual affair, was held to honor the senior pledge class for our ... awesomeness? Surviving this long as sorority girls? Something like that.

It was a nice little affair, with sundresses, pretty centerpieces, and cool senior gifts.

And while the catering food at OU has never been good (possibly one of the only things I wont miss about this place), the desert never fails to satisfy. I mean, how can it, when it's a honkin' huge piece of chocolate mousse cake? Delish.

Anywho... it was a nice little celebration to wrap up the end of our college careers as sorority women.

For those of you who know me, you know that I don't usually claim my sorority-ness. In fact, I shun sorority t-shirts like the plague and spent all of freshman, sophomore, and junior year trying to convince people that I was cool despite my sorority membership. I cared way too much what people would think of me were I to admit that I belonged to one. Which is stupid. If I cared so much about people judging me for belonging to a group, I should probably just have quit the group, right? You'd think so. But I guess that's not the way I operate.

And now I'm a senior. And seniors in sororities can basically do whatever they want -- not go to things, show up for the fun stuff, cut in line (sorry bout that one), etc. Perfect for the chronically-uninvolved sorority girl like me.

Though, in all seriousness, even though on the outside it looks like I've done everything possible to avoid my sorority while in college, I'm not entirely sad I joined a sorority. I mean, there has to be a reason I stuck with it this long. Through Chi O, I met some really good girls (whom I feel honored to be associated with) and I met my roommate and wonderful friend Madison.

I also got to live two blocks off campus in a swanky big house for a couple years, and someone cooked me my meals. I got to go to date parties and dance it up a few times a semester. All in exchange for a few Sunday evening chapters and other minor inconveniences. I really can't complain.

I'll even go as far as to say that I wouldn't take back joining my sorority for anything. It was a great experience -- something that not many people get to experience -- and at the very very very least, it'll make for some good stories.

I hope.

It'd better.

RedBud Film Festival

The Student Film Production Club hosted our 3rd Annual RedBud Film Festival on Tuesday. My last major event to plan as a college student is over. Hallelujah!

Overall, it went pretty well. We had a record number of films submitted, and the films selected were our strongest set of student films yet. Production quality and story content have really stepped up this year, and I really couldn't be more proud of everyone (SFPC member or not) who made films this year. So awesome.

My heart is swelling with pride. From something I had zero control over. Go figure.

Of course, the event wasn't perfect. I was late showing up, we had some technical difficulties with someone's film, and we had some rando guy pull an "I'm Still Here" stunt on us. He was filming a documentary of himself (in exactly the same way that Joaquin Phoenix filmed his short "going crazy" stint), and decided to use our festival for one of his stunts.

So at intermission, he runs up on stage and steals the microphone, complaining about how his film didn't get submitted -- "I'm an artist! I'm an f*cking brilliant artist! My film was perfect!"

Not cool.

After he was forced off the stage, one of our filmmakers chased after him and gave him a piece of her mind, shaming him into writing me an apology email.

Crazy stuff. Never a dull moment with the Student Film Production Club.

So now that the festival is over, my time as the SFPC is coming to a complete close. Next week is our last officer's meeting, which is really just a turning over of the guard.

Which has pretty much already happened.

The club isn't my baby anymore. Event at the festival, it was less a "Goodbye Virginia" than a "We can't wait til next year" feeling. Which is awesome. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Though I did get a song dedication at the get-together afterward. So no complaints.

I am excited about the future of the club, though sad I wont get to be a part of it. Having seen the club come up from absolutely nothing, and looking at the successful force it is now, I am really proud of my involvement. I can't wait to see what awesome things it does in the next few years!

#Senioritis

#Senioritis is my new favorite hashtag on Twitter. These tweets are speaking to my soul.

Or something like that.

I'm especially feeling that last one right now. Probably because I just completed the film project for my senior capstone class in less than five hours -- over the course of one evening. I may or may not have had a month to complete it.

Woops.

I mean, hey. I only have two and a half weeks left to live up my college career. I have #priorities.

Walking Up the South Oval

On Wednesday, we weren't the only group out on the South Oval soliciting the attention of our fellow students.

Walking up the South Oval, you'd see...

Camp Out to Stamp Out, an overnight affair where student groups build "houses" out of boxes to stay in overnight. They stand out on the Oval and collect spare change to help fight genocide.

After Camp Out, there was...

Green Week recycle bins, out of recycled material. Keep the Earth clean! Throw away your trash and recycle!

And then there was...

Team Crowdstory, handing out popsicles encased in plastic and a plethora of paper flyers from murdered trees, promoting our launch party with "Free beer!"

Just doing our part to help society.

Crowdstory Launch - Day One in Pictures

A successful day on the oval! We passed out ALL the popsicles and had to reprint flyers three or four times. I think we passed out about 700 flyers overall. Crazy. They go so quickly, especially from the 00:20 to the 00:30 of every hour (when classes are out and people are destination hopping).

Also, the snippet structure worked. Update on that one: Paper mache = failure. As soon as the balloon inside the paper mache deflated, the thing collapsed. But the new snippet top is a balloon (just no paper), which is still cool. And functional. Very important.

Overall, it was a pretty successful day. OU students are pretty used to getting paper flyers on the oval, so they weren't particularly excited to be getting more -- until popsicles were introduced to the mix. Total game changer. People were more than willing to accept flyers when free sugar water  was involved, and we even had people forgo to the popsicles but still ask for/take the flyers. Score.

I am excited to see the download numbers for today, and I'm even more excited to see the turnout at O'Connell's tomorrow night. Things are really rolling!

To stay up to date on our shenanigans tomorrow, follow us on Twitter at www.twitter.com/crowdstory (and/or #crowdstorylaunch) or check out our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/crowdstory. It's going to be a great day!

Crowdstory Gets Ready for OU Launch

Team Crowdstory blanketed campus last night with posters and chalking, preparing for our on-campus launch Wednesday and Thursday. We will be on the South Oval on campus from 10 - 3 p.m. both days, handing out popsicles and flyers promoting our launch party on Thursday night.

Stop by if you're in the neighborhood. I may even give you two popsicles. If I like you enough.

The launch party on Thursday night should be awesome too. It will be at a popular bar on Campus Corner called O'Connell's, starting at 10 p.m., and there'll be live music by The Rockettops and awesome drink specials for people who download/tweet about Crowdstory.

Look for #crowdstorylaunch to blow up the Twittersphere on Thursday night.

As of now, the Facebook event for the launch party has a god number of people coming -- I hope it gets up past 100 RSVP'd, because we have 100 free beers to hand out. I'd hate to see them go unclaimed, and I certainly don't intend to drink them all myself (though I'll probably need a drink when this is all over).

I couldn't be more excited (and stressed) that this launch is finally here. Team Crowdstory has been focused on preparing for it ever since we got back from South by Southwest in March, and all the pieces are falling into place pretty nicely (though I'm still on a desperate search for speakers for the band -- anyone?).

It's going to be a great couple days for Crowdstory.

If you're in the Norman area, I hope you come out to O'Connell's! We'd LOVE to see you there!

I Want to Be an Ex-Pat

I am currently entertaining the idea of running away to Europe after graduation. I don't know where I'd go, but I'd use the money I've saved (to buy a car) on a one-way airplane ticket, an apartment, and putting up flyers about tutoring "with a native English speaker." Bam. I'd have a place to live, a job, and a little bit of extra dinero to tide me over until the tutoring started taking off.

About one-eighth of me is entirely serious about this plan. It's feasible. I know someone who did it. And if I could just make my student loans disappear, I'd probably be almost one-fourth entirely serious about this plan.

The future is stressin' me out, and the only thing I really want to do -- with all my heart -- is travel. Get out of the States. Live and breathe a different culture. Learn a new language. Write and take pictures.

I'm too impatient to wait a few years to do this. Darn financial limitations. Why do you exist?!

Afternoon at the Mont

When the weather is pleasant, all my friends and I want to do is be outside. Conveniently, just down the street is this place called the Mont, which has an outdoor patio. And their campus-famous swirls. And delicious chips and queso.

So the other day, to celebrate the gorgeous 80+ degree weather and the cool breeze from the incoming storm, Val, Brit and I went to the Mont for a swirl and some good chatting.

Now that we are getting so close to graduation (26 days!!!), all I want to do is hang out with my roommates and friends. I don't care about classes (though I still enjoy them) and I sure as hell don't care about homework. Hate to admit it, but my capstone project is going to be a joke. I'll be using Xtranormal, if that tells you anything.

And of all the things I'm going to miss here, it'll be the people. Sure, I'll miss the lifestyle. I'll miss being on my own time and own initiative. But most of all, I'll miss my roommates and the closeness we've created over the last year living together. And I'll miss the friends I've made during college (especially over this last year). Why is it that I meet all these cool people with only a year left to get to know them? Why couldn't I have met all these people freshman year? Oh the injustice! *shake fists*

I'm not ready to grow up. I'm not ready to get a real job. And I'm definitely not ready to move away and leave this oasis of awesome.

Anyone know of a good time machine salesman?

A Stroll in the Park

The weather has been absolutely GORGEOUS lately . . .  aside from a teensy minor irritation in the form of Oklahoma's tornado-like winds.

Seriously though. It's been so breezy that I haven't been able to comfortably wear my hair down in weeks.

Q: Why is Oklahoma so windy?

A: Because Texas blows and Kansas sucks.

Bahaha!

Sorry. Couldn't help it. Actually, I really couldn't care less about cross-state rivalries and yada-yada. But that joke still cracks me up.

Anyway, because the weather was so lovely yesterday, I went for a stroll through the duck pond on the way back from my stadium run. Well, I'm sure the park is called something, but we call it the duck pond. Due to the large number of ducks.

Yup.

Did I mention it was a beautiful day? I love the spring here. In Oklahoma, spring is my favorite season by far. Everything turns leafy green, flowers pop up everywhere, and campus turns into heaven. All I want to do is spend time outside. I have a feeling that this, coupled with my increasing appreciation for the Mont and overall lack of motivation, will make for a very pleasant, incredibly unproductive next four weeks. Can't wait!

Running Stairs at the Stadium

Check out the fancy stadium lights. Hardcore.

My Tuesday/Thursday workout is usually pretty boring. Run on treadmill at Huff, watch "Property Virgins" (or whatever that buying-a-house show on TLC is called), doing some sit-ups, and then walk home (sometimes half the workout, it's such a hike).

So today I decided to switch it up a bit and run stairs in the OU Football Stadium. The south entrances to the stadium are always open, so I often cut through on the way to/from classes, and I see people working out in the stadium all the time. And since I used to love running stairs in the dorms during my internship in Philadelphia, I figured I'd give this a try.

I almost died.

Seriously though. Heart attack waiting to happen.

I ran a down-over-up-over pattern, all the way around three fourths of the football field perimeter. When I started, I had the best intentions of going three fourths one way, and then going all the way back around. But when I completed the first leg, I was in major pain.

Tired legs + steep stairs = Disaster waiting to happen.

So I just jogged back around to my things and called it a day. After taking pictures, of course.

Painting lines on the football field -- getting ready
for the Spring Game (this weekend?).

Just In Time

Because Crowdstory and the Student Film Production Club and studying for the PRAXIS are consuming my life, I literally forgot to blog today. Plum forgot.

I don't remember the last time I just all-out forgot to blog. Usually I just walk around all day with twangs of guilt that I haven't blogged yet, but this forgetful business is a new one.

So here's a pretty picture I took while chatting with my pops on the phone the other day...

And with that, I hope you'll excuse me for the lameness that was today.

Love in a Better Blog Tomorrow,

Senior Stressball

Wood Printing in Art Class

I am in an art class this semester, and it is one of my absolute favorite classes. That I've ever taken. Because I basically get to be all creative and artsy for six hours every week, and it's like a small peace of heaven.

Right now we are working on wood printing, which is a blast. Wood printing is a process where you basically make a giant stamp out of compressed sawdust. It lends itself well to pictures with simple lines and off-the-wall creepiness.

I swear. Not sure why, but most wood printing art is really strange.

Anyway, the process is really neat -- and fun.

First I drew out my design on paper, then scanned it in to Photoshop and fixed it up. Then I printed it off with a LaserJet printer -- which is important. It's LaserJet or nothing with this baby.

After LaserJett-ing, we sprayed, on the back of the paper, some sort of solvent that strips paint off wood (and smells deliciously citrus-ey... dangerous stuff). We then placed the paper face-down on the block of wood (really just compressed sawdust), rolled it under this giant roller, and the pressure transferred the image to the wood. Like magic!

We were all really excited at first, because wood printing is basically a destructive art by nature. Instead of adding things, you are carving away. And while it doesn't forgive mistakes very easily, it's still really cathartic to attack the compressed sawdust with a carving blade.

That last sentence makes me sound like I'm crazy, doesn't it?

I'm not. Promise.

I'm just working through some unresolved issues about becoming a grown-up. Like I said before, it's an inner angst phase. No worries. I'll snap out of it and start painting lame things like butterflies soon enough.

Taaaaangent.

Whoops.

Anywho, we've been at the wood-carving business for three class periods now, and it is starting to get old. Even destroying things loses it's allure after a while. And it starts to hurt your hands.

In the picture above, my lovely classmate is demonstrating the technique of carving. All the places carved out will be white, and the areas remaining untouched (i.e. raised above the rest) becomes the stamp and stays black (or whatever color the ink is).

It's actually pretty neat.

The project I am working on is a birthday present for my dad. It involves wood printing and painting, and until my graduation, when ma pops will come down to Oklahoma, I think I'll hang it up in the living room. Hope the roommates don't mind!