. . .

"I know well what I am fleeing from but not what I am in search of."

-Michel de Montaigne

I took this quote from a friend's Facebook page because everything about it perfectly sums up my life in the past year and how I feel going into this next year of school.

I'm about to start my last year of college. I repeat. I'm about to start my last year of college. Maybe the more I say it, the more real it will feel for me. I am almost done with my undergraduate degree... then what?

I am about to enter a world where I don't have to go to school anymore if I don't want to. Where I get to/have to make all the decisions in my life, and the choices I make actually matter. What I say and where I go and what I do are important now on an entirely different scale of important, because I'm about to begin the task of building the rest of my life.

GAAAAAAAH!!! *At this point, panicked college senior grabs for paper bag.*

So back to that quote...

I know what I don't want out of life. I know the career paths and lifestyles that would make me unhappy and feel unfulfilled. But what about the rest? How am I supposed to work toward something if I don't always know what that something is?

At the very least, I hope this final year of undergrad brings me even a little closer to that elusive moment of perfect clarity. Until then, I shall run like the dickens away from any conversation that begins with, "So what are your plans next year?"