Sunday, May 2, 2010

List of What I Want My Future Love Interests to Know About Me (Without Having to Tell Them)

Let's be honest. All girls have the list. We wish men could read our minds and know how much certain gestures mean to us (or tick us off). Things would be much easier for us both, we say, if they just intuitively knew these important things about us (which, of course, will never happen).

One of my girlfriends and I were talking about this the other day, and between the two of us, we got quite a list going.

Some things I'd probably include on my list are:
1. Daisies are my favorite flower. Roses are nice for anniversaries and such, but when you want to surprise me with a "because-you're-the-best-girlfriend-in-the-world.-ever." bouquet (of which I hope to receive many), it's gotta be daisies. Love 'em. They bring so much sunshine and spunk to a room.

2. If you sing to me, I'll melt. Better yet, write a song for me and then play it on your guitar. I don't even care if you can't carry a tune in a bucket. Nothing is sexier than a man with a guitar.

3. I'd like to think that I'm pretty laid back and easy going. If our first date is a total flop -- we got lost on the way to the restaurant, where it turns out you forgot to make reservations anyway, so we grab take-out at the janky mom-and-pop place down the street and eat in the parking lot of the theater-- that's fine. I'm cool with that, and we can laugh about it later. But I'm gonna draw the line when you plan for dinner at Denny's and a movie at the dollar theater. If you can't do better than that, I question your ability to provide for my future family of twelve, our matching Louis Vuitton suitcases, and our annual Christmas vacations in Tahoe.

4. Saying things like "I don't give a flying f******ck about school" (in a sing-song voice, no less) is not attractive. In this instance, ignore the suggestion in #2 and pay particular attention to the last item in #3.

My friend's list included:
- Spontaneous back rubs are fantastic.
- But don't try to rub her back when she's angry. That's just dumb.
- Flowers don't fix everything (but buying her shoes might do the trick-- she's a size 9 and likes anything with heels).

Alas, no man would ever know these things about us (if I hadn't just written it all in a super public place, of course), because men can't read minds. Sometimes I wish they could, and at times they probably wish they could too. But then again, it's probably for the best that men can't read our minds. I mean, I pity the man who'd try to decipher my emotions-- More often than not, I don't even understand myself.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Blog Archive

About Me

... A few thoughts to pass the time...