Friday, June 4, 2010

"We're like the bug ladies."

There are bugs everywhere in our house. Most of them are roley-poleys (or isopods, according to Valerie, brilliant pre-med science wonder), but there's also an occasional daddy long leg or moth. I'm not really sure how they are all getting in, but they like to crawl into our house, where they all promptly die (I've mentioned this before-- I think our floor is toxic).

To be honest, they haven't really started to bother me yet. Mostly because all those insects I mentioned are pretty harmless. Thank goodness there haven't been many spiders yet. Or even better, no pincher bugs.

. . . The following conversation happened immediately following the above post. . .

As a matter of fact, I ponder, I don't think I've ever seen any pincher bugs here in Oklahoma.

"Hey guys, do we have pincher bugs in Oklahoma?" I ask, turning to the girls sitting on the couch beside me.

Brittany looks over my shoulder and reads the blog above. "Yeah they do. They're called earwigs."

"Earwigs? Why?" I ask. Stupid.

"Because they crawl into people's ears."


I'm sorry, but there is nothing more scary to me than a pincher bug. I don't mind spiders. I don't mind snakes. I don't mind ticks. But show me even a photo of a pincher bug and I automatically shudder involuntarily.

"Yeah, they crawl in your ear. That's why they are called earwigs," she says.

"I don't believe you," I say in self defense.

Brittany takes my computer from me and proceeds to scroll through picture upon picture of pincher bugs as she tries to find said information. I've already left by then, preoccupying myself with other things in a vain attempt to get rid of the very disturbing mental image of pincher bugs crawling in my ear as I sleep. By now I'm convinced that I will be having nightmares for weeks.

"Oh, just kidding," I hear her say (very unapologetically, I might add). "Wikipedia says that some people erroneously believe that earwigs crawl into people's ears at night and make burrows."

Hallelujah. I can sleep again.

That is, until Brittany slips into my room in the dead of the night and tickles the inside of my ear, which she's currently threatening to do. Gotta love friends.

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